Love Is

, by Christopher D. Hudson

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 

[[The following is an excerpt from the A Teen's Guide to the 5 Love Languages. Thanks to Moody Publishers for the permission to reprint the following]].

The feeling of being in love doesn’t last.

Well, you might argue, that might be true for other people, but not for me. You don’t know what my relationship is like. False. No exceptions. This is an ironclad, biological/emotional/psychological fact: the high of being in love does not last. For most people, that feeling you get (like a high) from being newly in love lasts up to two years. Maybe less. After that, the emotions calibrate toward normal, and you have to make a decision: Do you scrap the relationship and move on to the next emotional high, or do you figure out what real love looks like?

Now I’m not saying you should date the same person for ten years just to prove you’re not a quitter. There’s no prize for gutting it out in the wrong dating relationship. Depending on your dating philosophy (likely colored by your parents’ advice), you may find that dating different people helps you learn a lot about yourself and how to navigate relationships. I’m not arguing for being betrothed (old-school engagement) at age fourteen. What I am saying is that once you land in a long-term relationship,  whether that’s at age 18 or 28 or 58, if you want it to last, then you must have realistic expectations.

Those expectations are rooted in a true definition of love. Love isn’t two starry-eyed lovers being drawn together by a magical, gravitational force, while a romantic soundtrack plays in the background. Love is not a feeling; it’s a choice. Love isn’t about getting everything you want and need and making sure you always feel happy. Love is a choice to meet someone else’s needs, to sacrifice for another, to want what’s best for the other—even when it’s hard.

For more information about the Teen’s Guide, visit


Post a Comment